Friday, November 19, 2004

How to scare a girl in ten ways

1. Send her the following sms: “what makes you feel alive?”, when you don’t know her that well.
2. Continue to send her smses when she’s only a couple of feet away from you, until she has to tell you to stop it.
3. Say, “isn’t this romantic?” more than once when you’re just having a drink together.
4. Take lots of photos of her.
5. Tell her that you’ve been naughty and that you’ve been looking her up on the internet.
6. List out all the websites that she’s been on, including a complete description of her photos (damn these internships/conferences).
7. Invite her for dinner through sms AFTER you’ve seen her in person about five minutes ago.
8. Thank her profusely for spending time with you, through sms of course. Well, ok this isn’t so bad but the long sms about how wonderful I was, what a good heart I have, if I need anything, please don’t hesitant to ask, makes me rather nervous when we’re just supposed to be friends. I get nervous when male friends become mushy.
9. Send her smses littered with “chat talk”. For example: “U R full of Life”. Smses are no excuse to sound illiterate!
10. Send her a sms, saying that she’s full of life (U R full of Life) and it’s so easy for men to fall in love with her.

Ok, ok, maybe some items on the list isn’t so bad, and could be construed as rather romantic (I guess) but when the attention is not mutual, it makes the recipient really antsy.

Yeah, recipient of “How to Scare a Girl in Ten Ways” is me. Wooooo….

I had my suspicions for a while but was assured by my friends that I was just being perasan (how to explain.. that it’s just in my head, nothing’s going on). Item #10 finally convinced them – I think. What the hell, it doesn’t matter. I’m kicking myself for not trusting my instincts and believing someone else’s (as much as I love them) opinion instead. Maybe then, I wouldn’t have accepted his invitation for dinner (I downgraded it to tea only) that night, and him later on sending me mushy smses, that ultimately culminated to item #10. Eerrk!

He’s just not my type. I know, I know, we’ve all gone down this road with me but seriously, I’m just not interested. He’s too… sappy: too touchy-feely with his feelings. He’s so self-effacing, to a point where it’s actually annoying. He’d send me an apologetic sms for making a really good chess move for a game that was played the day before (but I later kicked his butt after that move – hah). Give me a ‘me, Tarzan, you, Jane’ type any day. Heee..

Well, seriously, I rather like the challenge of someone who is willing to argue with me (but also with the humility to accept that they could be wrong). I like someone who tells me as it is, and isn’t so mushy to me all the time. A manly man, that’s what I want. Not so much on the touchy-feely emotions - I don’t need another girlfriend.

In any case, any guy who tells me that they’ve been naughty because they’ve been looking me up on the internet, and then proceeds to describe in detail about the online published photographs of me, is a NO-GO. I can’t emphasize enough. No way, Jose. Hit the road, Jack. Keep on going to Creepsville (oh, he’s actually a really nice guy, but he’s trying too hard).

What’s another no-go? Any readers of this blog. I need space, I don’t want to date someone who’s read my blog or alternatively, has a blog of his own.

So where do I go from here? I have to tell him that I’m not interested, and will never be so please don’t hang around hoping, because I know I won’t change my mind. I wish I have the option of running away and never hearing from him again (re: Bali) but ah well.

I’d like to meet a nice boy one day but it’s probably going to be a loooooong period before that day arrives (my job doesn’t allow me to get out much). And you know what; I’m ok with that because there’s still so much I’d like to do on my own. And he’d be the one when I don’t feel smothered nor have an urge to run away. Now, if I can properly deal with the unrequited amours.


At 11:31 AM, Blogger JM said...

Nice post - this really happened to you? Actually, it sounds quite okay - well, may be a bit too much stalkig via SMS, so.

Just tell him that you want to stay friends and that there will never ever be something between you. If you are clear about the message, he should get it :)

At 11:41 AM, Blogger brucetct said...

this is interesting ways huh. but how come all in SMS? is it because SMS getting cheaper and cheaper now? :)

At 6:10 PM, Blogger mac said...

Sorry to hear that. Unwanted attention, what an inconvenience huh ?

You should tell him no and tell him no to his face. And tell him what he's doing wrong.

It's uncomfortable but being honest about your lack of interest is way better (and fairer) than to start avoiding him.

Sometimes people (esp. men) need a slap in the face. As someone who used to do (well kinda) 8 out of the ten things, I should know.

At 10:39 AM, Blogger Dee M said...

Sounds like a stalker,which won't just scare you,but me too!Although no 8 was done nice,except he could just stop at thanks.

I'd like to meet someone nice too,but right now..I am holding too many cards which doesn't include a relationship.:p Anyway,no rushing around.

At 11:11 AM, Blogger Marita Paige said...

Y'know, Cayce, reading all those comments. It would be very very creepy if we didn't know Sappy. And I hadn't thought of it as stalking, but in a way, it is. But I feel more bemused rather than worried knowing that it's Sappy, and you can handle Sappy with one hand tied behind your back and one eye closed.

At 12:30 PM, Blogger A. Zulkifli said...

Some guys try too hard. Over compensating for their perceived shortcomings. Why they are trying so hard, that's the question. Most times thos who try hard tend to be possessive, bordering on domineering. Depends on what you want really. I know some who really like these things. Imagine me, a guy, having guys do the things on your list on me. That would REALLY be creepy. LOL

At 2:21 PM, Blogger Froot said...

why is he so 'shy'? always using SMS wan.

At 11:39 PM, Blogger sativa said...

You just tell it straight to him, Cayce. He seems to be in stalker mode now. Better to just tell him to stop it. No need to SMS. :p

At 2:50 PM, Blogger Daniel said...

Hmmm, creepy. Have you thought of some kind "go away" lines like, "Sorry, but I'm afraid if I see you naked I'll vomit myself to death"...? + An English stand by is "I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire".

At 7:53 PM, Blogger Bertha said...

I would be plotting ways to kill him by now....Like what everyone else has said, be honest. Be prepared if he persists - some guys think girls like that sort of schtick.

And if anyone else has any tips on how to get rid of persistent guys, pass it along! ;)

At 9:11 AM, Blogger Cayce said...

hey, thanks for all the comments guys. Truly appreciate it.

Haven't had a chance to tell him yet because he's currently travelling - he'd be back by the end of the month. Makes me wonder if he wouldn't have done #10 if he wasn't leaving the next day! Arrghh..


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